Sexual Wellness Defined
/sek·shoo·uhl wel·nuhs/
- A state of physical, emotional, mental, and social well-being related to sexuality; it is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction, or infirmity.
- A positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences free of coercion, discrimination, and violence. To attain and maintain, the sexual rights of all persons must be respected, protected, and fulfilled.
- Having access to sexual health information, education, and care. Practicing safe sex and seeking care when needed. Experiencing sexual pleasure, satisfaction, and intimacy when desired. Communicating about sexual health with others, including sexual partners and healthcare providers.
I want to make it clear that sexual wellness isn’t solely about sex—it’s about embracing pleasure in its many forms. Think more than just the physical experience. Think about how we touch ourselves, connect with others, and even create art. Sexual wellness is about allowing ourselves to feel good and being unapologetic about it because we recognize that it is crucial for our mental health. Mental health and sexual wellness are intimately connected and vital to our overall well-being.
Sadly, sexual wellness is often overlooked, stigmatized, and usually ignored in conversations about healing from trauma, anxiety, or depression. However, when we embrace our sexuality in intentional and healthy ways, it can be healing and transformative even, helping us to reconnect to our bodies, build our self-esteem, and foster emotional resilience.
The Golden Burst: A Visual Metaphor for Vitality
The swirling soft hues of sage green and deep purple represent the gentle rhythm of breath. The burst of gold is meant to represent vitality and warmth. Imagine taking the golden burst in the center and letting it represent your right to experience joy, sensuality, and safety in your body.
Now close your eyes and imagine it expanding outwards, filling the space around you. The feeling you feel and the warmth surrounding you is how healing through pleasure can begin.
How Sexual Wellness Supports Mental Health
- Reduces stress: Sexual arousal can lead to a decrease in cortisol, the stress hormone, helping to mitigate the negative effects of chronic stress.
- Boosts mood and self-esteem: Engaging in sexual activities can improve mood, increase self-esteem, and enhance overall life satisfaction.
- Improves physical health: There are physical health benefits associated with sexual health, such as a reduced risk of heart disease.
- Aids in trauma recovery: For survivors of sexual trauma, reclaiming sexual pleasure can be a crucial part of healing by helping them reconnect with their bodies and a sense of aliveness.
The Healing Path: Reclaiming Pleasure
Trauma and Disconnection
Trauma, specifically sexual and reproductive trauma, can create a disconnect between someone’s relationship with the body and with pleasure. Other mental health issues like anxiety and depression can make a person feel disconnected, numb, and undeserving of any joy. When we embrace and explore pleasure, it can offer us ways to reclaim and reconnect to what was lost or hidden.
Ways to Cultivate Sexual Wellness and Pleasure
- Practice mindfulness: Engage in practices like body scans to reconnect with your body and its sensations.
- Prioritize slow, intentional pleasure: Focus on the sensations of touch, arousal, and connection without pressure. Slowing down allows for a deeper experience.
- Use breathwork: Focusing on deep breathing can help ground you, slow racing thoughts, and reconnect you to your body's center.
- Open Conversations: Open communication is key to sexual satisfaction and can lead to emotional and physical benefits.
- Explore solo: Reconnecting with your body and pleasure through self-exploration, which offers similar benefits to partnered sex.
- Seek professional help: Consider working with professionals like pelvic floor therapists or somatic sexologists if you are struggling.
- Scheduled intimacy: Scheduling sex or solo play can be exciting and allows you to prepare your mind, body, and spirit, promoting agency and control.
- Embrace Variety: Be open and curious about your sexuality. Explore different types of touch, textures, or resources like ethical porn or erotica.
Art as a Path to Healing
I want to encourage you to reflect on the concept of sexual wellness and consider creating your own piece of art. Think about what pleasure means to you. What are the colors, shapes, or textures that come to mind? Use the images to guide your creation.
While you create, try to notice any emotions that arise and implement them into your artmaking. Express it through your art and claim it as your pleasure so your healing can be your masterpiece.
After completing your image, you can journal the emotions and thoughts that came up, engage your senses with soothing textures or breathwork, or use affirmations to reinforce your connection between pleasure and healing.
Conclusion
When we heal through pleasure, we are taking back a narrative. Anxiety, depression, trauma, pain, new parenthood, whatever your case may be, can no longer steal from us. Reconnecting with our whole selves by tuning into our bodies, honoring our desires, and embracing moments of joy are all intentional steps toward mental wellness. Allow yourself to feel good.